So really, what is the deal with "Strike anywhere matches"? This box I got at home, half the time doesn't even work when I use the striking strip on the side of the very box itself! And it says "Strike Anywhere"! They need to readjust their name. Maybe "Sometimes strikes on hard, rough and particularly grainy surfaces, like sandpaper and very flat granite rocks, and the striking strip on the box itself, sometimes, if you hold it right, but that's pretty much it... Matches". That's better.
And while we're on the subject of Grandpas, why do they always have smashed thumbs? Like, seriously, come on! Is there some kind of initiation or something? Some "Mark of the Grandpa" that I'm unaware of? They say they're always doing stuff in their "shops" or "sheds" or "workplace". What are they really doing? If I'm supposed to believe it accidently ends up with them smashing some phalange every time, they've got another thing coming. Elderly, I'm on to you.
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